Title : "Write the story of a specific hurt you want to forgive. Then write it again as more of an observer..."
link : "Write the story of a specific hurt you want to forgive. Then write it again as more of an observer..."
"Write the story of a specific hurt you want to forgive. Then write it again as more of an observer..."
"... without emphasizing how bad the wrongdoer was or how you felt victimized. Look for at least three differences between the two versions."“What forgiveness does is sort of free the victim from the offender,” said Tyler VanderWeele, the director of the Human Flourishing Program at Harvard and one of the co-authors of the study. “I would never say ‘Once you’ve forgiven, everything’s fine.’” But it is a better alternative to rumination or suppression, he said....
Asked to define forgiveness, VanderWeele said it's "just to replace ill will toward the offender with good will." And: "Forgiveness is not forgetting the action or pretending it didn’t happen; it’s not excusing or condoning the action, and it’s not the same as reconciling or forgoing justice."
VanderWeele describes a forgiveness exercise: "[S]et up two chairs and pretend the offender is in one of them. After describing what happened from your perspective, you sit in the chair of the offender and describe what happened from theirs. It can be a bit unsettling, but it’s a very powerful experience."
“What forgiveness does is sort of free the victim from the offender,” said Tyler VanderWeele, the director of the Human Flourishing Program at Harvard and one of the co-authors of the study. “I would never say ‘Once you’ve forgiven, everything’s fine.’” But it is a better alternative to rumination or suppression, he said....
Asked to define forgiveness, VanderWeele said it's "just to replace ill will toward the offender with good will." And: "Forgiveness is not forgetting the action or pretending it didn’t happen; it’s not excusing or condoning the action, and it’s not the same as reconciling or forgoing justice."
VanderWeele describes a forgiveness exercise: "[S]et up two chairs and pretend the offender is in one of them. After describing what happened from your perspective, you sit in the chair of the offender and describe what happened from theirs. It can be a bit unsettling, but it’s a very powerful experience."
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